Not becoming. UNbecoming.
One day.And the three months it sits inside.
Most people who come here are not trying to fix anything. What follows is the whole protocol in order: the month before, the day itself, and the eight weeks after it.
- Prepare
- Interrupt
- Integrate
You are not preparing for a trip
You are preparing to have something removed.
What happens on the mat is one day out of three months. A month of preparation before it. Eight weeks of integration after it. The day is the shortest part, and on its own it is worth very little.
This is not a one-off event. It is a protocol, and the protocol is what you are enrolling in.
Creating the ground
One month. Before you go anywhere near the molecule.
Medical intake and eligibility
A licensed physician conducts the intake conversation and determines whether you are cleared. Not us. Him. Some people are not eligible and are told so.
One-on-one preparation
Sessions with a licensed clinical therapist, working through the material that would otherwise surface on the day with nowhere to go.
Nervous-system preparation
Interoceptive acceptance, somatic settling, and resonance breathing: practices that train your system to stay open while its own alarms are firing. This is trainable. It is the difference between meeting the state and fighting it.
You will also be given daily practices drawn from mindfulness-based cognitive therapy, plus audio and written material. They take seven to twelve minutes a day. People who do them have a different day than people who don't.
- Practices
- Audio
- Screening
- Clearance
A regulated system meets the state. An unregulated system fights it. The month before is what determines which of those happens on the day.
The Day
One day. Kelowna, BC.
- A private, one-on-one 5-MeO experience in Kelowna, BC, with no stimulation and nothing performed.
- Up to two people are on site on a given day. You will never share the room and you will never share the experience. You will share the preparation and the debrief, and you will probably be glad you did.
- The day is a Friday. You have Saturday and Sunday before anything is asked of you.
- Not a peak state. Not a ceremony. For a few minutes, the assumption that there is a you in here and a world out there stops running. Nothing is added. Nothing is repaired.
- Two facilitators, present the entire time. At the doses we work with you cannot speak or signal, so one attends to your body and one attends to you. Neither of us is ever the only person watching.
What the day looks like
- The room is floor-to-ceiling glass on every side. In the morning the light comes in from the left. In the middle of the floor there is a firm bamboo mattress with a wool and cotton cover, and a blanket if you want one. You sit in the middle of it, facing out at the lake and the mountains behind it.
- Sixty to ninety minutes of preparation and orientation. Body movement, guided breathwork, an awareness practice. Nothing you haven't done before, done in a specific order for a specific reason. If a second person is on site that day, this part is shared.
- One-on-one, with both Nicholas and Fehren present. Fehren sits on your right. Nicholas sits on your left. Once the molecule is prepared and given, we watch. If you need something, one of us gets it. We speak when spoken to, or to give you an instruction you actually need. That is the whole of our job for two hours.
- We use pharmaceutical-grade, lab-purity-tested synthetic 5-MeO-DMT, administered in a highly calibrated, minimal-dose format, in the staged sequence described below. A dose can only be staged if it is known.
- A window of roughly two hours is allocated to the experience, sometimes less and sometimes more. Each administration's acute effects last ten to thirty minutes; most of that window is not the molecule, it is the room and the two people in it.
- Between doses there is around ten minutes, longer if you need it. You drink water, you use the bathroom if you want to, and we talk. We record a voice note about the dose you have just come out of, while it is still close.
- Then at least ninety minutes of reflection and debrief before anyone goes anywhere. The most common sentence we hear in it is “that was not what I expected.”
- Most people start reaching for the meaning of it almost immediately. We tell them today is not the day for that. We answer what we can, and we describe the shape of the eight weeks ahead so that the first session is not a surprise.
What the next few days cost
Most people are flattened afterward, physically rather than emotionally. Deep fatigue, long sleep, and no appetite for the things that normally fill a day. It usually takes the rest of the weekend. This is not the molecule, which clears fully within the hour. It is a nervous system recalibrating.
That is why the experience is on a Friday, and why the accommodation we provide runs Thursday to Sunday. Thursday is the latest we suggest you fly in. Sunday is the earliest we suggest you fly home, whether or not you stay with us.
Noise is the common one. Music, television, anything running in the background can be genuinely difficult for a few days. It passes.
Up to four administrations, in three stages
Each stage is assessed before the next. We do not begin at the top of the dose range and hope. A fourth administration is sometimes given: a repeat of an earlier stage, or a stronger version of the third. It is never assumed, and most days do not need it.
Acclimation
A low dose. The body meets the state without having to fight it first.
Fundamental Awareness
The core dose. The assumption underneath the self stops running.
Catharsis
Some systems discharge, with shaking, movement or sound. Some don't. Neither is a sign of anything.
What we stopped doing
Three things have come out of this protocol since we started running it.
Preparation used to include raising your heart rate through dance, as a way of practising regulation under load and surrender in an uncomfortable setting. We stopped, because we could not find that it was doing anything.
We used to use neurotechnology beforehand to prime the brain for the experience, and for a while during integration as well. We stopped for the same reason. We could not find evidence that supported it.
We changed the vaporiser. The one we use now vaporises the dose more consistently.
This is what a protocol is supposed to do. You keep what survives inspection and you remove what doesn't, and the list will get longer.
What makes this container different
- You are never rushed and never alone. Nobody else is in the room, and nothing about the day is on a clock that isn't yours.
- No chanting, no ritual and no dogma. Nothing in the room is there to make the day feel like something.
- We remain in the room the entire time. Physical contact happens only where you have consented to it in advance, in writing, during preparation — because at the doses we work with, you cannot consent in the moment.
- You will receive guidance only as needed, with no projections and no pressure to interpret what occurs.
The two of us
Present the entire time. One attends to your body. One attends to you.
What you may experience
We did not build this to offer an experience. We built it so that what happens on the day survives contact with the rest of your life.
- The sense of being a self, located somewhere, looking out: briefly absent
- No imagery. No narrative. Nothing to interpret afterward
- Physical discharge in some people: shaking, movement, sound
- Time and space not distorted, but suspended
- No memory of it in the ordinary sense, and no way to describe it
- Afterward, a different relationship to the stories you have been carrying
None of these is the goal, and people who arrive wanting a particular one of them tend to be disappointed, because the state does not take requests.
You will never be left alone, you will never be pushed, and nobody will tell you what your experience should have been.
This is not a psychedelic trip. Nothing is shown to you. Something stops running, and for a few minutes you are not there to notice it stop.
The day is also not therapy. Nothing is processed, interpreted, or worked through on the mat. That comes afterwards, with your integration lead.
You may not be able to describe what happened. Most people can't.
Then the eight weeks of application begin.
What happens for eight weeks
Five phases. Weekly one-on-one sessions, every one of them mandatory.
The day opens a window of neuroplasticity. It closes. What gets built inside it is the only thing that lasts, and building it takes eight weeks.
This is the part everyone else skips. It is also the part you are paying for.
Stabilisation
Daily contact. Four things confirmed each day: you are sleeping, you are eating, you know where you are, and you have made no decision you cannot reverse. Nothing is interpreted yet. A walk outside, and that is all that is asked of you.
Containment
One session. Beforehand you listen back to your own recording of the day, and the session stays with what happened rather than what it meant. Meaning made too early buries the material that matters.
Processing
Weekly, one-on-one. The method is chosen after the day rather than before it, by what actually surfaced. There is no standard curriculum, because there is no standard day.
Translation
Weekly, on the gap between knowing and doing. One change a week, run in your actual life, reviewed the following week and adjusted. This is where most integration ends and where most of it fails.
Consolidation
What specifically destabilises you. The practice you will actually keep, rather than the impressive one you won't. Who you call. Written down.
The closing call. Phase Five ends on a call rather than tapering out. What you built is reviewed, what is still open is named, and the work is handed back to you deliberately. The protocol ends here.
The gates
You do not advance because four weeks have passed. At intervals you complete a short questionnaire yourself. Your integration lead sees how the work is actually going, and the physician reviews what you submit. A phase extends when that review says it should.
Between every phase there is a gate. If you are not ready, the phase extends. If something is wrong, you go back to the physician and his assessment continues rather than being handed on.
Time is not the qualification.
Who holds it
One integration lead carries all five phases. The physician who cleared you stays reachable throughout.
Our clinicians are not named here, for the same reason our physicians are not: they prefer it, and their credentials are available on request during intake.
After it ends. Charok Lama Rinpoche holds weekly group calls, and you are invited to them. They are open, they are optional, there is no end date, and they are not part of the protocol you paid for. Nobody is in the room with you during this protocol and nobody ever will be. This is what is available once it is finished.
Without integration, the day becomes a story you tell. An interesting thing that happened to you once. It is the reason this protocol is three months and not one.
The investment
$7,500 USD
The full three-month protocol. One month of preparation. One day. Eight weeks of weekly one-on-one integration.
A $500 deposit covers intake and the eligibility assessment with our physician. If he does not clear you, you do not proceed, and the deposit is partially refunded — you will have spent a fraction of the price finding out.
Payment plans and financing are available. Accommodation, Thursday to Sunday. Included on most dates and confirmed when your day is scheduled. Travel is not included, and extending either end is yours to arrange.
Who this is for
A physician decides who is eligible. The rest is a question of whether this is the right moment.
- Have a life that works, and a question about what all of it is standing on
- Have done a fair amount already and are not looking for more of the same
- Are looking for clarity
- Want to understand the structure rather than collect the experience
- Are prepared to stop managing the situation for a few minutes
- Are emotionally and physically stable
- Or are carrying something that years of work never reached
- In active psychological crisis, or who need trauma therapy — this is not that, and it is not a substitute for it
- Taking MAOIs, SSRIs, SNRIs, tricyclics, or lithium
- With significant cardiac disease, arrhythmia, or uncontrolled hypertension
- With a personal or first-degree family history of schizophrenia or bipolar I
- Who are pregnant
- Looking for a peak experience without the three months around it
- Who have not been cleared by our physician
The full list is on harm reduction.
What's included
- Private 1-on-1 5-MeO session with both facilitators present
- Full screening process and preparation protocol
- 1-on-1 preparation calls
- Eight weeks of weekly one-on-one integration, every session mandatory
- Accommodation, Thursday to Sunday, on most dates, confirmed when your day is scheduled
Is this right for me?
You may not know. Neither do we, yet. The application takes ten minutes, and it is followed by a conversation: to ask your questions and to work out whether this fits. There is nothing to risk: the only next step is a conversation.
Application, then a conversation. Medical screening comes after that.